Ah. movies that I can't stand to not watch when they are on TV:
Two Weeks Notice
The Wedding Planner
The Holiday
Love Actually
How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days
The Proposal
Any Jake Gyllenhaal movie
Any Mark Wahlberg movie
Any Ryan Reynolds movie
Today's evil was The Wedding Planner and Two Weeks Notice, back to back.
Comments, be done with. (Except, they are not.)
Sunday, June 3, 2012
Thursday, March 15, 2012
It has been quite an adventure here in Costa Rica. With two days left, I am sad about having to leave. It has been an extraordinary experience- the beach club that we have been allowed to stay at is pretty sweet--the people there have all been so accommodating; our condo has been pretty exceptional, given that there is no way to avoid the large ants that roam as freely as the redshirt men that come walk through our yard and pool and property every other minute of the day; and surroundings and food have been nothing short of spectacular. This town is also just a really cool hippie town--where people just want to live and surf. I know. sometimes the simple things in life don't always mean that they are the only way about it, but here, people seem to just eat to live, surf to live, and do the things they need to. 'Not everything is permissible or beneficial...' but I tend to think that we have become and overcomplicated society.
This leads me to my next story. For the past week that we have been here, everything has really fallen into place; we have had really great adventures, great weather, good food, good company--and I've met some interesting people along the way. But on Tuesday night, we returned from la playa to find that there was no water. "Thank goodness you have a pool," is what the property manager said to us. We had also been out surfing--needless to say, a shower was in order, but we were told that the town shut off the water when people were using it too much. hmmm. So we did the next best thing--we jumped in the pool, tried to get as much sand and salt off of us as we could, and then dressed for dinner and had an evening. The water was back on when we got back on Tuesday night, and we thought, "great, all is well."
Except that yesterday, after a pretty terrific birthday celebration day for Michelle, we returned once more to a waterless house. So...we took some desperate measures. I called the Capitan Suizo hotel, a boutique hotel down the road from our house, to see if they had running water. They did. And a last ditch effort (shameless I know) on my part resulted in asking if the three of us could possibly shower over at the hotel. I waited. and waited--their muzak is pretty nice--and waited, and then the nice man came back on the line: "yes, you can come shower". What a godsend!
So we hiked over, and indeed, they had a little bathroom with a shower stall for us to shower in--I have never, in a long long time ( my first shower after a service in the philippines, after finally being able to afford a bungalow with running water in Krabi, and after my camping trip in college, are some similar experiences) felt so thankful for running water. I was then met by a herd of cats and raccoons--feeding on dinner--in the hallway of this boutique hotel. Yes. this hotel has pet raccoons. weird. But I finally got to have a tamarindo juice, and we ended the day with some ice cream (homemade cinnamon and coffee) and a banana split and a strawberry tart.
Running water: it's a precious commodity. We have our conspiracy theories about this place, namely that they ARE trying to conserve water between the hours of 3-9:30pm (the water was, of course, running when we returned), but we are also aware of the fact that the developer is in a little bit of financial trouble.
ah, costa rica.
Friday, February 3, 2012
WAH. Wah wah wah: The irony of altruism, or my misconception of it.
it's hard to swallow the fact that my willingness to help others becomes detrimental in some sense, to me.
That whole notion of 'what goes around, comes around'? yeah, I'm not really seeing it at this point. So here's the case in point. Five years ago, after I had started my first year in this job I currently hold, I ended up having a conversation with a friend who was in a bind at his school. Things were bad, and he needed out. I knew that he might not be totally interested in the idea of teaching at a boarding school, or even any independent school for that matter, but I figured I would, at the very least throw it out as an option, perhaps, just to humor him. Surprisingly, he was interested. So I referred him as a candidate for a position at my school, and he got the job. Initially, I was thrilled. I hadn't really taken into account what would happen if he came in for the interview and was nothing close to the idea that the department had in mind for employment. I also had really no idea what his teaching style was like, or how he was as a teacher. So then I began to fret that this might have potentially been a gutting experience. Maybe my job was on the line too. But he passed with flying colors, and I breathed a sigh of relief and patted myself on the back--I thought I had done good for the department, and for him.
So fast forward to 2012. We have been working together for the past four years, and he and I have not only maintained a good friendship but we have also experienced the ins and outs of working at our school. We have both been on the hunt for jobs--perhaps I have been with a little more urgency than he, for a number of reasons. Except that when an opportunity at a new school down in New York opened up, I set off to try and establish connections and interest, and while I knew his interest was piqued, I encouraged him to also apply. I put him in touch with the connection I had, and then we both ended up traveling down to interview. He said his interview was strange and rushed. Mine had been similar, but nevertheless, I felt that I had had some good talks with the people behind the scenes. I followed up with emails, and I'm sure he did the same (or maybe not?) but we both did not hear back from the school afterward. He was willing to take that as a 'no thank you'; or a 'don't call us, we'll call you' response, and seemed to just move on. I thought it wouldn't hurt to follow up about the process. so I did. and I got a response, which said, ' just wait a little longer.' So I did.
Only, he ended up getting the job offer, and took it (as he should, because, he should!), and somehow, although I am really really happy for him, it's just hard to accept the fact that in some way, I play some role in the hand he was dealt. I on the other hand was not offered a job, and while an email was written because of the fact that I would probably catch wind of his hire, there was a vague explanation of 'we didn't select him 'over' you, he just fit the needs of our school better.' sounds a little conflicting in my eyes. But what can I do? I didn't get it. And yet...maybe I shot myself in the foot. It's hard to be rejected. And I know that we are two different people, but maybe I'll never really know why, and I'll never fully believe or just take that line as the sincere reason. I don't know why I can't.
It's these very sentiments that seem to defile any intended altruism, though, don't they? And then I don't know why I would want to be any more altruistic if in someway, that initial desire and motivation to just help selflessly gets squashed by the outcome. Or maybe I don't know how to be altruistic, or I really don't know that I've ever truly experienced altruism.
I could get into how this all spirals with God, but I fear that my impassioned state or frustration only breeds more resentment. I'd like to believe that altruism is rewarded, but I don' t know at what point...
I really am so glad for him. I know that he's wanted to leave, and I know that in the long run, I want to and ultimately have to be content with the way life plays out for each of us. But, i feel like this is the second time I have basically placed these two jobs in his hands. And I am feeling left pretty empty handed. and crummy.
That whole notion of 'what goes around, comes around'? yeah, I'm not really seeing it at this point. So here's the case in point. Five years ago, after I had started my first year in this job I currently hold, I ended up having a conversation with a friend who was in a bind at his school. Things were bad, and he needed out. I knew that he might not be totally interested in the idea of teaching at a boarding school, or even any independent school for that matter, but I figured I would, at the very least throw it out as an option, perhaps, just to humor him. Surprisingly, he was interested. So I referred him as a candidate for a position at my school, and he got the job. Initially, I was thrilled. I hadn't really taken into account what would happen if he came in for the interview and was nothing close to the idea that the department had in mind for employment. I also had really no idea what his teaching style was like, or how he was as a teacher. So then I began to fret that this might have potentially been a gutting experience. Maybe my job was on the line too. But he passed with flying colors, and I breathed a sigh of relief and patted myself on the back--I thought I had done good for the department, and for him.
So fast forward to 2012. We have been working together for the past four years, and he and I have not only maintained a good friendship but we have also experienced the ins and outs of working at our school. We have both been on the hunt for jobs--perhaps I have been with a little more urgency than he, for a number of reasons. Except that when an opportunity at a new school down in New York opened up, I set off to try and establish connections and interest, and while I knew his interest was piqued, I encouraged him to also apply. I put him in touch with the connection I had, and then we both ended up traveling down to interview. He said his interview was strange and rushed. Mine had been similar, but nevertheless, I felt that I had had some good talks with the people behind the scenes. I followed up with emails, and I'm sure he did the same (or maybe not?) but we both did not hear back from the school afterward. He was willing to take that as a 'no thank you'; or a 'don't call us, we'll call you' response, and seemed to just move on. I thought it wouldn't hurt to follow up about the process. so I did. and I got a response, which said, ' just wait a little longer.' So I did.
Only, he ended up getting the job offer, and took it (as he should, because, he should!), and somehow, although I am really really happy for him, it's just hard to accept the fact that in some way, I play some role in the hand he was dealt. I on the other hand was not offered a job, and while an email was written because of the fact that I would probably catch wind of his hire, there was a vague explanation of 'we didn't select him 'over' you, he just fit the needs of our school better.' sounds a little conflicting in my eyes. But what can I do? I didn't get it. And yet...maybe I shot myself in the foot. It's hard to be rejected. And I know that we are two different people, but maybe I'll never really know why, and I'll never fully believe or just take that line as the sincere reason. I don't know why I can't.
It's these very sentiments that seem to defile any intended altruism, though, don't they? And then I don't know why I would want to be any more altruistic if in someway, that initial desire and motivation to just help selflessly gets squashed by the outcome. Or maybe I don't know how to be altruistic, or I really don't know that I've ever truly experienced altruism.
I could get into how this all spirals with God, but I fear that my impassioned state or frustration only breeds more resentment. I'd like to believe that altruism is rewarded, but I don' t know at what point...
I really am so glad for him. I know that he's wanted to leave, and I know that in the long run, I want to and ultimately have to be content with the way life plays out for each of us. But, i feel like this is the second time I have basically placed these two jobs in his hands. And I am feeling left pretty empty handed. and crummy.
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