My dad told me yesterday that I would no longer be a part of the family if I did not get married.
The exchange went like this:
Me: Dad, what if I'm not supposed to get married? Maybe I won't get married. I'll just adopt kids and raise them.
His words exactly: "You are no longer part of the family" (exactly as it was. but imagine a monotone voice with a bleak and stern voice. HE didn't even look at me when he said it.) I want to remember that he said I was no longer his daughter...wow.
Me: Dad, are you giving me an ultimatum? (with a look of shock and awe!)
Dad: ..... (shaking his head) you are not part of the family.
But the day before, when I asked him if he'd be okay with me not marrying a Korean man, he turned over on the air mattress and went to sleep. WOW.
I'm not sure how to feel. part of me thinks he was just trying to scare me, and part of me is a little upset by this reaction, but I don't know. At this point, I know that I'm just working on parts of me. But I guess, I feel like it's a little selfish of him to be asking or demanding for something to happen that's not entirely in my power...it's just not a good feeling. like my position/place as a daughter is conditional based on my achievements. wow. this is the 21st century right? I hope that I am perceived with more merit that isn't reliant on just personal acheivements.
peace.
3 comments:
i think the point is to show that you are making an effort. have they done anything to help you along here???
i am in the same boat as you - plus i have 3 years on you. don't sweat it kiddo, you're in ok shape. :o)
my grandma in korea hung up on my sister's merry christmas call after sally said "no - no boyfriend yet". :) maybe it's time for that year abroad? now!
wow, in the words of cher from clueless, "that was way harsh." i am sure your dad is overselling the drama to make his point but still, ouch. if my mom said that to me we would definitely be rumbling, even though i'd know deep down she was saying that because of worry, not to be cruel. but chin up - you are not alone!
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